One thing that I missed throughout this time is having a proper date with Mr.D. I feel like our several years dating weren't enough. I miss trying new restaurant in town, or just going dinner to our favorite cafe.. Sitting and talking and chillin and holding hands.
Being a parent is all about commitment. We can easily slipped away by left our son with my mom or mom in law. But I can't. We can't. I know this sounds ridiculous because there are so many parents out there do the same. Well we can go but our hearts not "in the moment". Vale has been a major major part in our lives.
I didn't really think Mr.D felt the same way.. Until one day he said, "ah how I miss spending all day all night with you, holding hands and watch the movie, doing ridiculous things and eat delicious (or not!) food, driving and go home late." Hahaha. He got that blues too. I thought it was just me. Apparently, parenting has finally taken its toll. :D
Anyway, meal time is very hard recently. Some days were better than the others, but some days were awful. Honestly, I've cried a little more than 2 times this week cos my son didn't want to eat nor drink nor poop properly. His digestion went into viral cos he didn't want any kind of fruits that I was offering him and he didn't want to drink either. That was depressing, he hadn't poop for three days. He ate his meal but with tantrums. He screamed and screamed and spilled his food. I was like, I don't want going through this thing again with baby #2! Mr. D even said, what if we only have 1 kid? LOL. We're about to give up having baby again..
My weight was going nowhere but down down down. I was 3kilos lighter than when I got married nearly 2years ago but I don't feel fit. I remember I was once dying to loss my weight, but now I feel terrible. My blood pressure is very low. Despite I eat A LOT, but I don't feel like myself. My eyes aren't shining bright, my ass sucks, and my boobs are assymetrical! Geez. Oh God I'm exhausted.
I had my private yoga class, but I often skip it because I can't leave Vale. The yogi teacher came to my house, but still, I have to make sure Vale is in good hands. So if my Mom can't babysit him then I skip the class. I don't know why, but my #1 priority right now is my son. Anything else comes in second.
So here's the magic mantra: THIS TOO, WILL PASS. Tantrums will be over and baby will grow so fast before my eyes. In the meantime, let me fly to several years ago... Where Mr. D and I were still bar hopper and wine drinker. Lovely :) miss you darling. Miss us.
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