when i only have 1 kid, i was this kinda mom who really strict on everything, let alone screen time. i thought vale didn't expose as much to that.. until my 2nd arrived, i was in the borderline of my sanity. so i thought to myself, hey i deserved a few minutes of peace. since the only thing that can "shut them down" were gadgets, so i let them watch every other day. but as days went day, obviously they wanted more. and i unconsciously gave the gadgets whenever they "made a scene", like when we were at public places. it was easier to gave them gadgets rather than to yell and scream over and over again. Am i right ladies? FYI at that time, i still limit their screen time to max 30 minutes per day. but when it became daily routine, i realized, oh no, this was wrong. thankfully it only occurred for a few months.
Straight after that, we entered the withdrawal phase. even though their gadget consumption was minimum (compared to how my friends gave to their kids). but it still hard to detached them from it. dinner time became increasingly challenging cos the kids were unable to sit down. and when at public places, it was getting a lot harder to wind them down. but my husband and i weren't a quitter. we kept it that way til the kids no longer attached to it anymore.
i felt kinda sad to see how most kids glued to their phones/gadgets most of the time when they out in public. sit on a stroller, ipad in hand. eat in the restaurant, iphone in hand. even there are kids who walk with their phones in hand while play games. if they behave like this when they're out, imagine what happen when they're at home.
So when you happen to meet us at restaurant, chances are, our kids will not be sitting down properly. They would running around and do silly things. But hey, remember, they're just being kids. people nowadays tend to get upset when there are active kids in the room. i know it can be irritating somehow, but I don't know, IMHO it's still way way better than seeing kids sit with gadgets, totally ignore their surroundings. i don't want that uncomfortable silence.. It kills me.
well don't get me wrong, i don't say gadgets are trash, i even use it all the time to manage my online shop. but i don't think kids at young age need that much of exposure. without gadgets, the kids become more creative. they will use their imagination, they will eagerly read from the books about all sort of information. they play interactive games, they go play outside the house, and they will eventually develop a hobby. best of all, we will have discussions. i'd rather have an opinionated kids than a yes-man. Oh some say that their kids can play interactive games on ipad.. LOL. i mean, drag, tap, swipe aren't really interactive. i think the varieties of interactive games in nature is endless since they can play really physical outdoors.
I have to admit in this digital era and age, i definitely find it's inevitable to avoid gadgets. but at least as parents, we can rule it out. i still let my kids watch on weekend. usually it's episodes night, i choose the movie/documentary for them to watch and divide it into 2 sections. so they can watch it on saturday and sunday. but usually if we're busy, we'll forget it altogether and do something else. But i do expose them to music. we'd be listening to Michael Jackson this week and The Beatles the next. my son really like MJ he listen to his music every single day.
this leads to another topic.. For the past year, our family avoid malls. except when we need to buy something or watch some interesting movies, we'll go. but other than that, no. we don't go to malls anymore. not on a weekly basis like we used to do. we choose to expose the kids with outdoor activities as much as possible. our kids don't own many toys as well. that's why they are very creative when it comes to playtime. i often said that we don't have that much of money, so we no longer buy toys like we used to. only on special occasions. that struck my son a lot. one day we went to the mall, and i said you are free to choose whatever toy you want. my son was amused cos there were sooo many toys to choose from. i asked him, hey do you want lego? or hot wheels? and he said no, it's too big, must be expensive. LOL. he ended up choose a toy that cost only IDR 100.000ish and my darling daughter chose a small toy cost IDR 39.000.
did i feel bad at them? not at all. on the contrary, i'm very proud of them cos i can see that they can let go of their dependency to things. i mean, toys might look interesting when it's brand new. but i bet kids will get bored with it in matter of hours.
this type of parenting is surely not for everyone. it takes a lot of effort from parents, especially to PLAY with them. i don't know whether it will do them good in the future, i just do what i believe in. after all, it's only my $.02
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