Skip to main content

Billie

Sweet memory... Kenn and Billie

Kenn, Dieter, Billie



Last night I dreamt about Billie [picture on the right]. And it was a nightmare, really :(


So Billie came to me, hugged me tightly, and he said that he was sick. He was keep crying on my lap.. Then I woke up, in tears :(




Have I told you about him? About one year ago, my Mom adopted him. Actually he's one of our family relative. But unfortunately, he came from a broken-home family. His parent got divorced, [and I don't understand why], no one really care of him, [he was around 3.5 y.o], his Mom runaway to Jakarta, while his Dad built a new family with his new wife! What a bastard!


So my Mom decided to brought him to our house and stay with us AND without permission from another family member. Our reactian was like, "wtf?". Cos Billie is a very rebellious kid [no wonder, considering where he came from!], he's wild, and yeah, he's annoying. I didn't treat him right at that time. So did my Sister and my older Brother. I really really love KIDS! But Billie... I don't know why I couldn't love him..

Only my Mom, Dad, and my boyfriend who took care of him.


But starngely, slowly but sure, he took our heart away.. Although he's very naughty, but I could see in his eyes, that he wanted to be showered by care from a family that he never has :(

Contrary to my lil brother, everyone love him, everyone care of him, everyone praise him. Billie doesn't get it. He could go to sleep without drink his milk, he could walk to his school alone. That was so sad if I remember those moment. He's just not as lucky as my little brother.


Months after he arrived in our house, I finally changed my bad behaviour to him, [actually not that bad, my sister was worse]. My boyfriend said, "You hate his parent doesn't mean you hate him too. He's just a victim. We can't blame him."

After he said that, my whole world was like, fallout. I realized that I was wrong, totally wrong. My boyfriend was right. Billie is just a bad victim from his irresponsible parent.


I started to love him dearly, I ask him to play with me, we're eating together, watching TV together, even I cleaned up his ass. I can't believe if I open my heart, then everything becomes clear. I understand where Billie's bad act came from.


Then his Daddy took him away from us, maybe he realized his mistake. [But I don't believe him!! How could you trust a man whom left his family for a new wife? Yuckkkkk]

But what can we do? Cos he's Billie's biological father.

So my Mom given Billie to his Dad.

Everynight on my prayer, I always hope that his Dad treat him right. And I was shocked with my dream last night, I hope he's fine. Please God promise me that he's fine.. :(


Bye Billie... You'll always in our heart

Labels:

Comments

Demetrius said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
August 7, 2008 at 9:12 PM
Intan Juliana said…
Yeah actually I think about him all the time.. Since he moved on. Cos I felt guilty, for what I've done, in the past. But what can I do now, beside pray for the best.

Thank you D for always takes time to read my blog and leave a comment in it. What more can I say? Oh, really appreciate it!! :)
August 8, 2008 at 8:51 AM
Demetrius said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
August 9, 2008 at 1:08 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

.

I'm shaking as I type this.  After so many years I haven't update my blog, but i feel like now i need it more than ever.  Writing use to be my therapy.  so. my husband died. on 22-11-22 to be exact.  85 days ago  there. i say it.  you won't believe how much courage i've gathered to type this post here. the very blog that witness our journey. from a hopeless teenager, to finally got married, and eventually became parents of two adorable kids. too bad i didn't get a chance to update it more. however i frequently updated my twitter & instagram. so there are traces of our journey there as well.  how do i feel? PAIN. EXCRUCIATING PAIN. A PAIN THAT IMPOSSIBLE TO CURE My heart so tattered that there's nothing more to be torn. He died a sudden death. I won't go into details, at least not now. Our 20 years journey ended abrubtly. there goes our future hopes and dreams. __________________ I begin to questioning the existence of God. We've lead a good life. w...
Post a Comment
Read more

still..

current mood : still upset Every children biggest dream would always be make their parents proud. Including me. But how? Many whispers came to my ear that said, "Go ahead and find your place at your Dad's Co.", "Why wasting more time with useless job?", "Don't ever try to work in a -desperately-needing-investment Bank!", and blah and blah and blah. Dude I really wanna show my Dad that I can earn myself money. Now my new car is on its way to my garage doesn't mean I'm fully happy. I mean, I feel very grateful with my Dad's present, but I realize that it will burden me. How long until I can earn my own money? Let's rewind to two years ago, when my friends busy to get a part-time job. This "part-time job" means SPG (Sales Promotion Girl), or Bridesmaid (at someone else's wedding), or Wedding Organizer's crew. That's all we can do for our status as a under-graduate student. Nothing else more and nothing else better...
10 comments
Read more

W.W-II

My boyfriend and I have been fighting a lot lately.  What the heck is our problem? What is left to fight about? Don't we fight enough? I thought seven-and-a-half years is more than enough to get to know each other. Seven years ago, what we fought about was jealousy. I hate seen him with his female friends (let alone his ex girlfriend!) I hate to accept the fact that he loved his bike more than me, I mad when he late to picked me up. Seven years later, the problems between us are rapidly growing, to some serious ones.  Here comes the question: WHAT KIND OF MOTHER WOULD YOU BE? ...dead silence... That second I thought, holy shit.  How could he ask this weird, tricky, and unimaginable question? Honestly, I couldn't help it. He trapped me.  I muted for a while. Not because I didn't know the answer, of course I want to be not just good, but a GREAT mother (who doesn't anyway?)  But Dieter isn't the type of man who easily satisfied with a shortcoming answer. He nee...
6 comments
Read more